Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday to you, my dearest friend.

I'm sorry if you have to spend it in the hostel today. I know you have little tolerance for my cat so I specially edited 2 pictures to make it one. Anyway, I made you look pretty in a bow! Especially for you!

Teach A Bear To Fish

"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man how to fish and he will eat for a lifetime."

Now, say we try to teach a bear to fish, so you know, it can eat for a lifetime. We also try to teach the bear to read, to jump, to sing, to listen, to respect, to play musical instruments, to do Maths, to write poems and stories, to use the computer and to create art so that it can be a genius, so that it can contribute to the eco system.

However, if the bear fails to do all that or some of that, the bear might have learning disabilities. It can be dyslexia, hyperactivity or attention deficit. We then tell the bear, sorry but maybe we have to put it in another circus, where they teach intellectually impaired bears or put it in many many programmes, so that we can help the bear. We exhaust our list, but our bear is still disabled.

We get tired, we get upset, we get demoralised simply because our bear, is not learning as well as other bears!

Has anyone considered that the bear might just want to be fed by someone else for a lifetime?

After all, I want to be fed by someone else for a lifetime.

Based on a telephone conversation

A lady promoted a software to my work place but did not exactly quote the terms and condition. I was conveniently put in charge.

Over the telephone, I told her that we have about 21 people confirmed, but still awaiting confirmation from some others. I asked her some questions and she told me the software is best for office use. Well, our computers in the office are quite run down and we asked her since the software would be ours, can we also use it at home? She said only for single PC use and best be installed in the office. I told her I needed to make the T&C clear to my colleagues as many of us thought that it was a shareware kinda stuff. The discount offer for the software still stands if there are more than 10 ordering. She also asked me to email her the order the next day so that she could process it and for the order to be created under my email so that any updates could be sent to it.

Being the rep, I had to make this condition clear to my colleagues so that they will not be misled. About 8 canceled, including myself. So I passed on the ordering to another colleague. She then emailed her the final list and the lady replied that she went ahead to order for 21!

In the first place, she did not accept my order over the phone (I thought we had a casual conversation cos she wanted an email and she even told me that we might have to wait up to a week for the products) and then, asked for an email to be sent to her with the names. I really cannot comprehend why she went ahead to order without the email that she insisted and after telling her I had to make it clear to my colleagues! In the end, she told me that she will have to cover the loss for the other 8 sets and it made me look very guilty. In the whole conversation, she stressed that she would have to pick up the losses but was not interested in hearing the reason why the orders were canceled until I finally had a chance to ask her when she paused for breath, "Would you like to know the reason why the orders were canceled?"

She finally realised or not realised the miscommunication. As a business person, I pity her, but there's really nothing much I can do. If she really wanted to take my orders, she should have waited for what she insisted, an email, before ordering the exact copies. Sigh.

Heaven

Bryan Adams. Enjoy.

Thanks!

Thanks, for being so tolerant, if only others can too!


http://www.pets.com.sg/forums/showthread.php?threadid=32773

Respect

http://www.todayonline.com/articles/168810.asp

Like Ali G will say,

"me would dig wot dis geeza said, it makes sense and all da mingin about killin just make people check bit thick. respect!"

Translated:

I like what this guy said, it makes sense and all the crap about killing just make people look stupid.

Don't ever try this at home!

When Teaching Children

When teaching children, never ever double standard or interfere. It confuses the kids and makes you look like an Ass!

It takes a village to raise a child.

Friend

My grandpa has a friend who never takes a bus and walks everywhere he goes. He is a stubborn man and he never takes food or drinks from anyone.

He must be in his late 70s. He has never been to our place since we moved and has no idea where we stay except for the neighbourhood in general. Somehow, he managed to end up downstairs our pace. How can he, a frail old man who can barely walk 3 steps walk all the way from his home to our home? Almost 5 km!

We invited him in but he refused. I walked him to the stone bench with my grandpa and offered him a hot drink and some food. My uncle offered him a cigarette. Being the proud man, he refused. We offered to call his family to pick him up or send him home in a cab but he did not want to go home. Finally, my father came home and sent him back.

My grandma said that because he was such a chauvinistic man, his wife refuses to take care of him in his old age. I'm so glad he found his way to a friend.

Come

Who is Pebble inviting into the house? Must be one of her kitty friends.

Kway Chup

Toa Payoh Lorong 8 got nice kway chup... Good for rainy days!

Have I told you lately that I love you

Sitting in the bistro just now, they were playing my favourite song.




It has certainly brought back many memories for me.

Dim Sum Dollies

A pair of twins we used to see at a tim sum place in Serangoon Road near Mustafa. Cute aren't they?

SkINFUL chicken vs SINFUL chicken

OOH! delicious crispy chicken skin without any fats deep fried to perfection. But once its cold, it can taste really weird. Not used to too much skin yet.

Hello

On my way home last night I saw a cat who look like a slim version of Bleblesaurus and suddenly, I said "Hello" to it. My colleagues all got a shock when the cat gave a loud meow and went back to groom itself. Community cats can be so friendly. I bet they speak more languages than we do!

STOP ANIMAL ABUSE

If anyone abuses an animal intentionally, he or she is bound for hell, for an animal is defenseless. The most brutal of all living things is human.

"The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated."

Mohandas Gandhi

A Very Important Number

This number is what you MUST have in your phone book.

REPORT animal abuse. Do not let any bastards get away!

SPCA - 62875355

Make it your duty and your passion.

Don't Dump Animals

Do you throw your family members away?

http://www.spca.org.sg/help_us/dump.asp

Photos

I like having black and white or sepia photos taken of me. I feel that they are so romantic. It's like living in another era when love was so old fashioned, so unconditional. Unfortunately, I'm not so photogenic.

When will I...

When will I strike 4D, so that I will have more $$?
When will I strike TOTO, so that I can quit?
When will I become slim, so that I can wear more stuff?
When will I, sigh...

They never let you go

Even for my side line, I still have to meet 2 of the most horrible wolves. Yes, they howl. Even when there are so many to choose from, I'm still fated to get those two... Damn, they never rest.

Profpig ^@^

Prof of Pig?

Howlers

I wonder why some children howl these days... Maybe they were once bitten by werewolves or did one of their parents mate with a wolf? Scary thought and I see packs of them almost everyday, everywhere.

Dieting Cat

My cat's too fat, says the vet. I bought it diet food. YC said blame the owner but why blame me? My cat's the glutton, not me!

Working out

Saw some kids at gym lesson today and they were having so much fun! I wish I had gym lessons then. But darn, I did not even want to continue dance class. Guess I'm not much of a work out pig after all.

"Long Kang Chim Chim"

Thanks to Linda, now we all know that someone wants GOLD assets and what is "long kang chim chim"!

Way to go Linda! We know that you'll be a great educator!

Never Die Before...

Dun play play ah! See me so gentle I will scold and scream at you if you try to distort facts! Like the Kopi Soh at Melben seafood at AMK. I ask for cold chrysanthemum tea she give me hot one. Tell her nicely but she started ranting. Somemore dare to tell me I was busily talking. !@#$%^ Think I still 10 years old issit?

But Sophia is the best. She breaks beer bottles if you don't give way to her! Idol!

When Guinea Pigs Talk

Bun Bun: You know got this human on Dawn's Blog every day want to cull cats, remove lizards and take dogs away?

Hunny Bun: Issit? Got such thing ah? Why?

Bun Bun: Cos she no like you know. She scared of cats, dogs and lizards.

Hunny Bun: Then how? She scared of rabbits? Later she want to kill us for rabbit stew a not?

Bun Bun: I dunno. But I suggest we all sterilise her and then tip her ear, like all our kitty friends then dump her in Central Australia lah!

Hunny Bun: Why so lay chay? Cull her can liao. We call Town Council say we scared of her lah!

High Class Bunny: You low class piggies make so much noise. I'll call the town council to trap you and cull you!

Hunny Bun: Shaddup lah!

Bleble: What's up?

Bun Bun: OOH! You got register your pet human? Some koo koo want the TC to kill everything she no like, even estates far away from her home cos she visits there.

Bleble: Aiyah, I microchip my human liao. She cannot go out for long or I'll start to worry.

Hunny Bun: Better dun let her go out at all. U know ah, her own kind is the most dangerous ah!

Bleble: Yeah lor!

Bun Bun: Even if not dangerous, later high class bunny complain also tio ah!

Bleble: Let's just cull that koo koo. Then all will be fine.

Who Am I?

Wow!

Who's the confused one? U or ur owner?

Miss Piggy and her wisdom

Ever wonder why people who love you oppose you and what to do when it happens frequently? Miss Piggy is here to help.

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye. "

Such wisdom.

Why do I have to see the parents of some kids

Whoever you are, cause I really have no idea, wrote this well:

The only reason I always try to meet and know the parents better is because it helps me to forgive their children.

~Louis Johannot, Headmaster, Institut Le Rosey, Switzerland

IDOL leh!

To Whom It May Concern

To Whom It May Concern,

Please .......................................


!@#$%^&


Let's see, these days people don't even bother to remember your name when writing to you? Not even a simple 'Thank you'? Strange indeed.